March 26, 2003 - 11:39 p.m. Let me first be clear about something: I’m going to be honest here. And of course I know once I write this a whole dramatic plot will emerge and I of course will play the asshole, but whatever. Time to speak my peace dammit. Shaun, you’re right its not all your fault is it? Naturally. [**Please note sarcasm] Your assumption today after work was as always uncalled for and quite frankly I am tired of it. I was merely asking my fellow employees if they thought that getting grounded for not doing enough scholarship work was a reasonable excuse to be grounded. An opinion question. I just wanted to know if I was crazy for thinking it was unfair to be grounded during spring break but whatever you don’t care do you? I was not making a “fucking speech.” That’s why I got pissed. Now for driving off like a bat outta hell, I am wrong for that and I apologize for driving off like that but it could not be helped. It would be nice that if you are going to be apologizing for something, or attempt to apologize, if you wouldn’t be an ass about it. Just food for thought…. I got home after these wonderful events and my dad calls, says he needs to talk to me. Turns out the old bastard was late on several insurance payments this past year. I’m not sure how he pulled that one off because there has always been enough money in my account at least to support me for three or four months if I needed the cash. So in an effort to punish him and all those present on his insurance policy, the insurance company, Allstate for the record, is demanding that by April 1, 2003 [my birthday just to remind a few of you what that day doesn’t mean to me] to receive the premium for the next six months. Now let me explain that my insurance premium alone is over $1800 for six months. I’m paying approx. $300/month. My dad decided in all of his infinite wisdom that he wasn’t going to help me out like he promised. So my account is around $1700 right now. Let’s recap….Insurance company wants from me $1800 by Tuesday and I don’t have the necessary funds. My dad has no money in his bank account so he can’t pay either. So I don’t know what I can do right now. Ain’t that a bitch? Then I find out my grandmother, my mom’s mom has a leaky valve in her heart. I think that’s what it is anyway. So she has to be on meds for now. The doctors don’t know what to do for her. This scares me a lot. I don’t know what to do now. I mean I’m losing everything I care about and my sanity and I cannot control it. I only hope that there is something the docs can do for my grandma, cause I don’t know what I would do without her. She means a lot to me. I learned something today. My mom is worth only a mere $40,000 if she dies. How can anyone put a price on someone’s life like that? I don’t think that $40,000 is nearly enough money; there is no amount of money that can be placed on someone’s life. That sucks. Damn this world. Well that's enough "bitching" for today. Have a wonderful night everyone and I'll update tomorrow.
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